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Destination Peach

Where Reality and Inspiration Meet

December 30, 2019

2019: A Year In Review

December 30, 2019

2019! Where did the year go? 2019 wasn’t a bad year for me. The start of 2019 was a slow ramp-up for me. Dealing with two family deaths at the beginning of the year, I didn’t officially start my new year until March.

For 2019, my word was “destination“. I used the word destination as the framework for me to be open to where ever the universe was leading me. The destination could be a place, mindset, person, or thing. En route of my many destinations I…

  • Worked on raising my vibration
  • Started therapy again
  • Read inspiring books
  • Attended a lot of Black curated events
  • Got Braces
  • Completed sea moss detoxes
  • Built solid relationships
  • Created and taught a workshop
  • Traveled
  • Did a photoshoot
  • Wrote thought provoking literature
  • Started blogging again
  • Was featured in a magazine
  • Coached Clients

Within the many destinations, I arrived at…2019 taught me to show up as myself! Showing up as myself was scary but freeing. I confidently celebrated what makes me, me! From showing up, I gained constant awareness of my vibration. In my awareness, I actively worked on shifting my frequency. Don’t get me wrong, everything in 2019 wasn’t “peachy”. I experienced many defeats. I felt many emotions.

What made this year different was me holding myself accountable for every emotion and defeat I experienced. I didn’t give up on myself. I chose my peace and happiness over everything else. Much of what happened in 2019 was beyond my control…I just rolled with the destination in which life was taking me. Could the year have been better, of course! Could I have finished every goal on my vision board, absolutely! Could I have put more effort into certain areas of my life, for sure! What resonated for me on a soul level this year was being happy and enlightened awareness.

I’m excited for 2020! I have already started working on a few 2020 action items. I have some great stuff planned. See you in the new year!

Until Next Time…

-Peach

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Filed Under: LIfe, Uncategorized Tagged: 2019 Year in Review, 2020 loading

December 23, 2019

When I Fell in Love With Black Women

December 23, 2019

This past weekend I had the honor of attending the event, When I Fell in Love With Black Women. The event was presented by Venus Clapback. Venus Clapback is a podcast hosted by Muse and Coco. The event was beautiful! I felt save and celebrated in this curated space! The event left me thinking about “when I fell in love with Black women”?

When I fell in love with Black women, I want to share about an experience from three years ago. Three years ago, I was at my lowest point. I remember the day when I realized I needed help! I called my mom sobbing. In a faint voice, I said to my mom “I need help”. My mom said, “baby it’s okay to seek help”. The comforting sound of my mom’s voice was the reassurance I needed to find a therapist. I am thankful to my mother because she was the sound voice I needed to get out of my own way.

Fast forward, I started working with my therapist. I chose a Black woman therapist. After years of working together, my therapist was moving to a new state. Prior to her move, we decided to break bread together. One final meal to celebrate all the great work we completed together. After our meal, we said our good byes. Immediately when I got into the car and cried.

It was in that moment, I fell in love with Black women for the umpteenth time. This woman played a significant role in my life. I am forever thankful for her grace. I get teary eyed thinking about the impact she had in my life. She allowed me to attend sessions when I couldn’t afford to pay. She arranged her schedule and made time to meet with me. She answered my calls at random hours of the night. No matter how depressed, anxious, or problematic I was she never gave up on me. Knowing that our relationship forever changed with the move, I had to mourn the relationship gracefully.

I knew that our work together was done and served its purpose. I knew it was time for her to go-fourth and help other Black women. The space and time we shared could never be duplicated. I am grateful for our frequencies crossing paths when they did. Black women are dope and beyond magical. Between the support of my mother and therapist, they showed up for me when I could not show up for myself. The support I received was the embodiment of love. This is when I fell in love with Black women.

I love Black women. I am a Black woman. I come from a strong lineage of Black women. And I will forever support Black women.

Until Next Time…

-Peach

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Filed Under: Education, entertainment Tagged: Black Women in AZ, When I fell in Love With Black Women Event

December 16, 2019

2009-2019: 10 Year Challenge

December 16, 2019

10 years! Where has the time gone. As we close out on this decade, I wanted to reflect. A lot has changed for me beyond the physical (lol). In 10 years, I’ve bloomed into myself. I am thankful for the woman I have become (disclaimer: I am still blooming). When I think about my life over the past decade, the journey has been interesting.

Looking at pictures from 10 years ago, I don’t even recognize myself. In 2009, I was afraid of entering the “real world”. I was a college senior in undergrad. Didn’t have a real job lined up. Didn’t know my purpose. Choose to be in a toxic relationship. I was a mess!

God knew my heart. In God knowing my heart, he slowly but surely started eliminating things and people from my life. The quarter life crisis was very real! I didn’t understand why everything was happening. I now realize everything happened for my greater good.

If I could tell the 2009 me about the 2019 me I would say…

  • To find your true purpose you will go on a journey.
  • Believe in yourself!
  • The creative ideas you have, work on them and stay consistent.
  • Stop allowing other people to control your life.
  • Stop waiting to see a therapist.
  • You are going to be a teacher, this was never a career goal of yours.
  • When people show you who they are believe them, stop giving people second chances.
  • It’s okay to be alone, you need to be alone to grow.
  • The things that matter to you know will not matter in the future.
  • The Saturn Return is a real thing.
  • You will become more spiritual, just embrace it!

From my 10-year growth, I proud of myself. TBH…I’m just getting start with life. I think 10 year challenges only become bothersome when people realize they haven’t done much with their life. If that’s you, don’t be that person. Change what you don’t like. Don’t wait till 2020 to start making changes. Start today!

Until Next Time…

-Peach

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Filed Under: Inspiration, LIfe, Uncategorized Tagged: #10yearchallenge, 10 year, 2009me, 2019me, End of a Decade

December 9, 2019

Representation Matters: an Ode to Black Girl Magic

December 9, 2019

Earlier this year I wrote this piece for a publication. It was my first attempt on contributing to a co-author situation. Long story short, my written contribution was denied because the writing “didn’t hone in on the Black women experience”. When I read the review, I was upset. I was upset because a non-melanated woman was trying to tell me what the Black women experience was like.

At that moment, I realized that I didn’t need this woman to validate my Black experience or tell me what it felt like to be a Black woman. I didn’t need this woman to create a space for me to share my story about Black women, I have my own platform.

Here’s a piece of what I wrote:

The conversation of diversity representation in professional environments has always been an issue of concern. Although, conversations surrounding the implementation of diversity and representation have been addressed there has been little to no progress. Such progress has been documented in the limited representation of Black women in professional environments (Cukier, Jackson & Gagnon, 2019). The limited representation of Black women remains prevalent in education and vocational industries. As a result, Black women have normalized the non-visibility of Black women in professional environments. The scarcity of Black women in professional environments is a concern.

There is an intentional need for more representation. A fundamental change is needed. Black women need to be accounted for at a higher percentage in professional environments. The absence of Black women in professional environments is problematic. Decisions in professional environments are being made for Black women without the presence of a Black woman. There is no doubt that Black women deserve to be included in professional environments. For every Black woman that is not accounted for in a professional environment it is a disservice to Black girls, Black women, and those trying to understand the narratives of Black Women.

Representation matters! Representation matters because it communicates the ways in which individuals, groups, and cultures need to be valued. When representation is omitted, it creates a societal strain on cultural inclusivity. Cultural inclusivity cannot shift without effective demonstration. Black girls, Black women, and people seeking to understand the narratives of Black women need to see Black women doing incredible things. It’s simple, “you can’t be what you can’t see” – Marian Wright Edelman.

Representation matters because more Black women need to see themselves in professional environments. Many Black women find themselves being the only one in many professional environments. Being the only Black woman in a professional environment is a perplexing feeling. When a Black woman in the only one in a professional environment, she is expected to speak on behalf of her entire race and gender. She is expected to code-switch to fit into the dominant culture of her environment.

Being a Black woman in society is not easy. Malcolm X once stated, “the most disrespected person in America is the Black woman, the most unprotected person in America is the Black woman, the most neglected person in America is the Black woman (Reed, 2019). The social structures that exists does not make it easy for Black women. Black women must work hard for everything they get, and have been known to work twice as hard as the competition to have a fighting chance at accessibility and opportunity. When another Black woman see another Black woman in a position of power it is a comforting feeling.  There is comfort in knowing, if one Black women can make it then another Black woman can too. Systematically, Black women were forced to create access and areas of opportunity from they’re marginalized experience.

The visibility of Black women in professional environments has either been limited or unaccounted for. In professional environments like education, Black women lead the number of degree recipients but observe less than 2% of management (De Brey et al., 2018; Mazzoni, 2018). Historically, Black women and Black girls have been falsely depicted by negative stereotypes. Such stereotypes have suggested Black women to not be warranted of careers of genius (Storage et al., 2016). Black women must be seen and presented in a way that is empowering. Every time Black women defy the odds at an exceptional level it is magical. The magical nature of a Black women is what we call Black girl magic.

References

Cukier, W., Jackson, S., & Gagnon, S. (2019). The Representation of Women and Racialized. 

De Brey, C., Musu, L., McFarland, J., Wilkinson-Flicker, S., Diliberti, M., Zhang, A., … & Wang, X. (2018). Status and Trends in the Education of Racial and Ethnic Groups 2018. NCES 2019-038. National Center for Education Statistics.

Mazzoni, M. (2018). Only Two Fortune 500 CEOs Are Women of Color. What’s Up With That? Retrieved from https://www.triplepundit.com/story/2018/only-two-fortune-500-ceos-are-women-color-whats/11146/

Reed, J. (2019). Cosmetic Counter Connotations: black Millennial women and beauty. The Meanings of Dress, 165.

Storage, D., Horne, Z., Cimpian, A., & Leslie, S. J. (2016). The frequency of “brilliant” and “genius” in teaching evaluations predicts the representation of women and African Americans across fields. PloS one, 11(3), e0150194.

Until Next Time…

-Peach

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Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged: Black Girl Magic, Black women, Black women excellence, Representation Matters, Work place diversity

December 9, 2019

Adult Braces: What I Wish I Knew Before Getting Them

December 9, 2019

Adult Braces! One of my goals for 2019 was to fix my smile. Over the years, I became very insecure about my smile. So insecure that I would smile with my mouth closed, and was strategic with how I spoke (to not show teeth). As I got older my teeth started to spread. My teeth had a lot of gaps and spaces. The spacing didn’t happen until my later 20’s. Hence, adult braces.

Adult Braces! One of my goals for 2019 was to fix my smile. Over the years, I became very insecure about my smile. So, insecure that I would smile with my mouth closed and be strategic with how I spoke. As I got older my teeth started to spread. My teeth had a lot of gaps/spaces. The spacing didn’t happen until my later 20’s. Hence, adult braces.

I got braces in April. Prior to getting braces, I did a lot of research. I originally wanted veneers, couldn’t afford it. I’m not Cardi B and I didn’t have a bag to fix my teeth. Braces were the affordable option. I got ceramic braces. Ceramic braces felt more adult-like. In seven months, my spaces have closed. I have to retrain myself to smile with my teeth, which is a good problem to have. I should have my braces off in two months. Not sure why I waited so long to fix my smile.

Before getting braces here’s what I wish I knew:

  1. Braces hurt
    • My cheeks and teeth always hurt, I’m just use to it now.
  2. Your facial structure will change
    • When teeth re-align correctly it is inevitable for your facial structure to change.
  3. High maintenance
    • Stay prepared with tooth cleaning supplies. The water flosser has been a life saver.
  4. Be prepared to take time off work for dental appointments
    • Getting braces is an investment of time and money. Missing and appointment can result in delayed progress. If you go to a dental office that is only open four days a week, you should work around they’re schedule.
  5. Can’t eat what you want
    • Having to give up crunchy food like chips, apples, etc. has been a struggle. Granted, I have lost 20 pounds. Food has become less important to me. Every time I eat, I have must clean my teeth. Thus, I would rather avoid eating to not brush my teeth.

If you’re considering getting braces as an adult…do it! Life is too short to live with things making you feel insecure.

Until Next Time…

-Peach

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Filed Under: Self-Care Tagged: Adult Braces

December 2, 2019

Black Women Excellence: Queen and Slim Film

December 2, 2019

Photo by Andre D. Wagner

Queen and Slim! Don’t even know where to begin. Saw the movie yesterday. Still in deep thought. Words can’t even describe what this movie means to me! There are many things I want to say but can’t put into context. So instead, I will just celebrate the work of Lena Withe (screenplay writer) and Melina Matsoukas (director) of film Queen and Slim. These Black women need to be protected at all costs.

These divine goddesses created a body of work, intentionally curated from the tutelage of a higher power. They are important for the culture. They are the embodiment of Black Women Excellence. This was a film I didn’t know I needed. This film changed the zeitgeist of what it means to be Black in America. Thank you, Lena and Melina, for creating a safe space for Black culture to authentically exist. Black people are magical and this film encapsulates that. If you haven’t seen the film yet, just go see it!

Until Next Time…

-Peach

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Filed Under: entertainment, Holiday Tagged: Black Love Story, FUBU, Queen and Slim

November 25, 2019

Creative Woes

November 25, 2019

I’m a creative being. As a creative, I am in this space of wanting to solely focus on my creative projects. Basically, be a creative entrepreneur fulltime. Get paid to be me!

This year, I have made more professional progress by investing in my creative projects, than I have at my 9-5 job. To be a creative is a complex cycle. My 9-5 does not feed my creative soul. I don’t have to be creative at my job. I am blessed that my 9-5 provides me with lodging, transportation, food, and travel…but I’m struggling! I feel like I don’t have enough time to be creative. Between work, dissertation writing, and self-care my time is spread thin. I squeeze in time during most days to work on creative projects.

I’m frustrated, but very aware my current experience is a minor caveat to the bigger picture. My frustration comes from knowing what I am supposed to be doing but having limited time to do it. For the creatives out there…when did you know it was time to let go over a 9-5?  Or how did you maintain your 9-5 while pursuing creative endeavors?

Until next time,

-Peach

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Filed Under: Inspiration, Uncategorized Tagged: creative, creative spirit, creative woes, life of a creator

November 20, 2019

The Timing Of It All…

November 20, 2019

Last night it hit me! As I laid in bed watching Bali travel vlogs, I had the aha moment! I’m finally going to Bali. I’m going to Bali at the beginning of the new year. Like for real-for real going! Like, tickets have been purchased, going! Villa fees have been paid, going! My suitcase it already packed, going!

If you can’t tell, I’m super excited!

My trip to Bali has been a long time coming. I always knew I was always going. Just didn’t know when.

Back in 2016, I made up my mind I was going to Bali. I watched the movie Eat Pray Love and just knew that’s where I needed to be. I connected with the character Liz Gilbert. She was literally a visual representation of my turmoil at the time. I figured if she went to Bali to find peace, then I needed to go too.

Months later, I got the opportunity to attend a writing boot camp in Bali. The writing boot camp was for two months. In my mind, I was like…” this is my moment, I manifested this”. I couldn’t pass up the opportunity, but there was a caveat. I had to come up with $ 30,000. Yes, you read that right $30,000. $30,000 included lodging, excursions, some meals, and coaching. Even with all the amenities, $30,000 was too much!

At the time, I had no job. I had my teaching 401K and unpaid bills. The day I realized I couldn’t afford the $30,000 price tag, I sobbed. I felt like I missed my moment. In my frustration, I made a promise to myself that I would go to Bali on my own terms and conditions. Years later, I had to trust the timing of it all. It wasn’t my time to go to Bali yet. I wasn’t in the mental space to enjoy Bali. I’m ready now.

In trusting the timing of things, sometimes it takes a little longer for manifestations to come true. The key lesson in waiting is having faith. As we wait…we must ask ourselves is it our time? If it’s not our time, will we make space to receive what we desire.   

Until next time,

-Peach

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Filed Under: Travel, Uncategorized Tagged: 2020 travel, Bali, Bali2020

November 14, 2019

Quotes and Notes #5

November 14, 2019

For a long time, I perceived challenges as something to be anxious about. The anxious energy was me assuming everything was not going to be okay. Overtime something switched. I began to realize I was anxious because, I was trying to control the challenge. I now know challenges are beyond my control. It is what it is. I can’t change the challenge, but I can change the energy I give to the challenge. Taking on a “is what it is” mindset helped me to relax about occurring challenges. It’s not to say that I don’t care about challenges, but I do care about what my body intakes on a mental-spiritual level. I can’t afford to exhaust myself mentally and spiritually, that’s expensive currency!

There is nothing I can do to control the circumstances of a challenge. The only thing I can control is how I respond. Before I respond, I question if the challenge is worth exerting my energy, knowing the challenge will quickly fade. Challenges appear as an attempt to teach a lesson and measure growth. If I am consciously aware and tapped into my “God Body”, I inner-stand everything is working for my greater good. With every challenge, there is a blessing. Case in point when I lost a committee member for my dissertation committee, I was BIG MAD! In my panic, I assumed worst case scenarios about by doctoral program. Feeling triggered, I checked my energy and made peace with the situation. It is what it is! In return, I found a new committee member who made the process much more fluid.

Me being at ease about challenges is not to say that I am a calmness guru. However, it is to say that when a challenge comes up, it triggers my anxiety to respond abruptly. To counter act the trigger I mindfully question myself about the challenge to re-ground myself. Lord’s knows it’s a process for me, but everything is working for greater good.

Let’s chat below…when it comes to challenges how do you go about overcoming them?

Until Next Time,

-Peach

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Filed Under: Inspiration, LIfe, Self-Care, Uncategorized Tagged: Greater Good, Lalah Delia Quotes, Quotes and Notes, Reflection

November 12, 2019

And Then This Happened…

November 12, 2019

My feature story on Voyage Phoenix Magazine is now live! I am super excited and beyond blessed for this feature. Special thank you to Arron Walker of Arron Walker Photography for capturing these beautiful visuals. Also, thank you to Rebecca Carrick of Rising Phoenix Reiki Studios for the recommendation. To check out my feature story click the link below.

http://voyagephoenix.com/interview/meet-carmen-peach-verdum-destination-peach-east-valley/

Until Next Time…

-Peach

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Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged: Destination Peach, Feature Article, Voyage Phoenix Magazine

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Hey-Heyyy, I'm Peach! Welcome to Destination Peach. Destination Peach is a lifestyle website where I share my lived experiences, best practices, and healing techniques. As a healer, life coach, and educator...my intention in sharing my story is to provide an authentic and safe space for people on their healing journey.

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